A unit of measurement, usually used for comparing dongs, which obtains its' value from what is in Jake the Snake Kaiser's pants. Its' legendary status earned it the right to be a unit of measurement. 1 kaiser= 1.5 ft=.47 m.
Luke: I know it's gay to mention, but I saw a guy in the changing room at the Y who was only .033 kaisers long. It was like a tic tac.
Kaiser: a humoristic title for a very rich and succesful person that is extremely extravagant (like an emperor of an empire), naming shaming and claiming the world, the universe and beyond. Comparable to the title of being the biggest boss that you´ve seen thus far.
John became a very succesful international entrepreneur after he graduated from Harvard Business School and during his extremely extravagant 30th bithday party the girls called him Kaiser.
Kaiser is an amazing guy! hes sweet sensitive and has an awesome sense of humor. He is very atractive and is deffinatly the guy you can count on. Kaiser is great boyfriend material and is very understanding and treats a girl like royalty! hes outgoing most of the time and easy to talk to but has a shy side that few people know about. he likes all kinds of girls, from blondes to brunets and even gingers! if you date him consider yourself super lucky! there arnt many guys out there like him!